Acceptance
by Graveygraves
Summary: Can they accept her return? Intially written as a one-shot post Ep for Series 7 Ep 1 - but now more. Does contain spoilers. Unbeta'd.
1. Graveside

**Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas.**

**Post ep for Series 7 Ep1 'It takes a Village'.**

**~*~ Profiler's Choice 2011 Fanfic Awards for the Criminal Minds Community ~*~**

**Hosted by ilovetvalot and tonnie2001969**

_It is our pleasure to announce the Second Annual Profiler's Choice Fanfic Awards for the Criminal Minds community! _

_The nomination ballot is now available, and all rules are posted on Chit Chat on Author's Corner forum! Nomination ballots must be received by October 15, 2011 and must be sent to this PM at Profiler's Choice CM Awards. Fics for consideration must have appeared on the CM section of between September 1, 2010 and August 31, 2011 (see rules for full details.)_

**. . .**

The soft mound of dark earth looked grotesque against the beautiful Autumnal setting. The lush green grass, scattered with the first crisp leaves, had been butchered at the very spot he stood. The very spot he had stood a mere seven months before. Then he had bathed in glorious sunshine, the gentle spring heat radiated around the team as they had buried their colleague, their friend, Emily Prentiss.

Today couldn't be further from that dismal day; the day that had ripped through him as he had barely managed to maintain the dignity that she deserved.

Now the slight drizzle dampened his skin and misted the air, smudging the previously clear outlines of his surroundings. Spencer let the sigh escape, his shoulders slumping simultaneously. As he stared at the gaping hole that he had seen to be Emily's final resting place, Spencer struggled to comprehend the truth as it had been explained to him. The woman he believed to be dead; was alive.

"Thought I'd find you here, Kid," the unmistakable baritone voice of Derek Morgan broke through his thoughts, as Spencer turned to face the intruder. Turning back to the disrupted grave, Spencer had nothing to say to his older colleague.

Derek was undeterred. Planting himself beside the younger agent, Derek stood silently; respecting Spencer's need for space, but making it clear he would not back off, just yet.

After what seemed an eternity Spencer stole a glance at Derek. He had expected his colleague to be watching him, but he wasn't, he was staring far beyond the point they were at. Derek seemed to be consumed by his own crazed thoughts.

"She looks well," Derek stated flatly.

Spencer nodded.

"Garcia and JJ seem to have accepted her; they are behaving as if she never left," Derek continued with some bitterness.

"She didn't leave, she died."

Derek huffed, "She didn't die, and she left and let us believe she was dead."

"But she's not dead, Emily Prentiss is alive, and she is coming back to the team."

"Yeah, doesn't make it any easier to understand," Derek turned to face Spencer, "I don't know if I can do what the girls have done. Pen and JJ are so forgiving, but I don't know if I can forgive her. I definitely can't forget what she has done. What _they _have done!"

Derek tried hard to control the anger he felt building in him, he had hoped the hours he had put in at the gym may have gone some way towards to subsiding it, but obviously not. In the short time that they had known of Emily's survival, Derek had been confused by his emotions, even his reactions were all over the place.

One minute he wanted to distance himself from everyone on the team, then there was the disgust at Hotch's lies, anger was constantly simmering just under the surface, waiting for an excuse to explode. Equally he could smile and carry on until something reminded him that everything wasn't back to normal, it had all changed; they had been lied to, deceived by those they trusted most. How could it ever be the same?

"I still find it hard to believe that she is really alive," Spencer let his head drop, staring at the soft turf below his feet, "It's stupid really, I've held her, touched her. But I had such vivid dreams so many times that she hadn't died, that it had all been a mistake. Is this all just another dream?"

Derek shook his head.

"I can't process what has happened. I can understand the logic, the theory, but I just don't know what I am supposed to do now. What is the correct response?" the innocent pleading look on Spencer's face upset Derek further.

"I have no idea kid, no idea. If I did then maybe I'd have a better handle on my own state of mind."

"I believe I should be happy, like Garcia and JJ, but I'm not," Spencer added, his eyes searching Derek's, "I feel so uncomfortable when she is around."

Derek had no answer to sooth his friend's troubles; he too was struggling in her presence. Even that first 'hug' had been strained, and it hadn't got any better. On a good day he could get swallowed up by Penelope's enthusiasm, and momentarily forget all that had happened, but generally he kept his distance.

"I don't know who I have more difficulty with. How are we ever to trust her or Hotch again?" Derek spat out. He had come here to help Spencer, but was starting to wonder who was helping who.

Spencer shrugged, "I have found it best to remain on a professional level with them both. If I am talking about a case, then I'm fine, but anything more . . ."

"Yeah, I get that," Derek sighed, lifting his head up and staring off at some unacknowledged point in the distance, "What I don't get is how we move forward, as a team, a family. If we don't trust each other, if we know we are capable of lying to each other, no matter under what pretence, then there is always going to be that doubt."

Spencer's foot begun to tap, rapidly, "I want us to be a family, you're the only family I've got."

Derek snapped back to the vulnerability of the young genius, far from helping, he now believed he was hindering. Putting a heavy hand reassuringly onto his shoulder, Derek squeezed lightly.

"Guess we'll have to find a way."

Spencer nodded, swallowing the lump that had risen in his throat.


	2. NA

**Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas.**

**OK so you can blame nebula2 for suggesting this wasn't 'finished' plus the added encouragement of Seditionary, so here is some more. I am afraid I will be updating this one as it comes – sorry if the delay annoys you.**

**. . .**

Sat in his SUV Derek Morgan watched the closed door to the Community Centre. It wasn't the first time he had waited outside this building, wanting to be certain of the security of one of the occupants. Derek knew that Spencer Reid was inside, he knew as he had watched him enter just over an hour previous.

This was where Spencer retreated when his demons were haunting him. Derek knew Spence was clean, but he also knew it was still a battle his friend regularly faced, especially recently. Over the years Derek had offered his support to his younger colleague, but Spencer preferred to ride this solo. Derek respected that, so he kept his distance - lurking in the shadows, ready if he was needed.

Hearing the click of the double doors opening, Derek watched the plethora of people pour out of the building. The range of the attendees of the NA meeting never failed to fascinate him. Taking a brief snap shot of the first few; their ages went from late teens to early fifties by his guess. There was those dressed smartly in suit and tie, to those with holes in their jeans and scraggy hair. No two were the same, yet they all shared a base element; something that brought them together to share their darkest secrets.

Somehow it bit into Derek that these strangers knew part of Spencer better than he did. They had been able to reach his friend in a way he couldn't.

Spotting Spencer scurry out, past the others, head down, Derek observed. He had seen him leave the building many times over the years, each time different, but today truly concerned him. He didn't like the way Spencer held himself, the uneasy nature to his attitude.

As he considered following Spencer into the dark night, he fingered the door handle and simultaneously removed the keys from the ignition. As his foot hit the ground, Derek was aware that Spencer had stopped moving. His head lifted as he looked directly at Derek. Sighing deeply, Derek acknowledged he had been rumbled. Leaning against the dark vehicle, Derek watched Spencer stalk towards him.

"You do know what anonymous means don't you?" Spencer spat as he was within feet of his older colleague.

Derek couldn't help but let at little smirk escape as he took in the anger.

"Yeah, genius I do," he nodded.

"Then what are you doing here? Again!" Spencer continued.

"Looking out for a friend," Derek answered matter of factly.

Spencer looked at Derek, he knew his anger was misguided in finding a target in the fellow profiler, but right now the cause of his frustration was not available. His shoulders slumped, as he realised how he had mistreated one of the few people he could still fully trust.

Noticing the change in Spencer's persona, Derek opened the driver's door.

"Lift?" he questioned, as he retook his seat.

Spencer shuffled uncomfortably for a moment, considering the offer. Right now he really didn't want to be alone, but also he didn't know how to reach out and ask for help - even if help was being offered on a platter.

Tapping his right index finger on his leg, he looked up at Derek and shrugged.

"How about you come back to mine, we can grab something to eat and . . ." Derek let his voice trail off, allowing Spence to direct the course of the evening.

Spencer's eyebrows furrowed as he took in the proposition. It sure beat an evening in solitude, with nothing but his all consuming thoughts for company. Slowly he nodded and move around the car to get in the other side.

. . .

Morgan led the way into his house, nudging Clooney back with his knee. The last thing Reid needed was the over-zealous German Shepherd bounding into him.

"Okay boy, come on and I'll find you some dinner too," he said, ruffling round the dog's ears, "Make yourself comfortable, Kid, you know the way."

Derek nodded his head in the direction of his lounge as he headed to the kitchen with the food, his faithful dog bouncing behind.

Within moments Derek was back in the lounge; plates, glasses and such in hand. Placing them on the table, he glanced up at a nervous looking Reid, who seemed to be hovering aimlessly in the middle of the large sparse room.

"You get the table ready and I'll bring out the food and wine, deal?"

Spencer nodded solemnly as he moved towards the dark surface.

Derek disappeared again, returning rapidly, filling the lounge with the gentle aroma of the spiced food they were to share. Placing the various containers onto mats on the table, he worked silently, observing the reserved nature of his friend. Without a word Derek sat down, having poured a glass of wine each.

Spencer sat down, his mind mulling over what he was to say and do now he was here.

Derek begun to help himself to the food.

"You know Kid, I'm here. I know you have always found it easier to talk to JJ or Emily, but I know those two aren't an option for you right now. I get the whole 'I can be so patronising' thing and I'm sorry for that, half the time I don't even realise I'm doing it. I'll try hard not to, but you need to talk to someone, before you get more of the headaches. I worry about you, man."

Spencer looked at Derek as he reached for some of the fluffy yellow rice.

"I just don't understand how they could do it," Spence said bitterly, as he concentrated on scooping the food onto his plate, letting his subconscious take care of the conversation, "How could JJ sit with me week in and week out; watching me, crying with me, consoling me and not tell me the truth? She could have made all the pain stop, and she chose not to."

Derek listened, glad that Spencer had found an outlet for his frustration;

"JJ did what she thought was best at the time, hey we've all made some bum calls in our time."

Spencer glared up at Derek;

"You really believe that?"

Derek shrugged, honestly he wasn't sure he believed it, it was more that he had convinced himself it was right, the only reasonable explanation, given the circumstances. Though in the back of his mind was the niggling thought that they would do it all the same should the situation ever arise again. That nothing had been learnt from what they had been through.

"JJ was following orders," Derek gave by way of a defence.

Spencer shook his head, playing idly with the food on his plate.

"I have been to more NA meetings in the last seven months then I have in the prior year. I was so close, so close . . ."

Derek knew, without it being said, what Spencer was referring to. The usually unspoken demon that still stalked Spence: Dilaudid.

He didn't have an answer; instead he reached towards Spence, placing a hand on his shoulder. Feeling the slight flinch at the gesture, Derek recalled his arm. Beginning to realise the extent of the damage done, he knew moving forward would be a slow and painful, but he wouldn't give up. Spencer deserved to have the stability of a true friend.

. . .

**~*~ Profiler's Choice 2011 Fanfic Awards for the Criminal Minds Community ~*~**

**Hosted by ilovetvalot and tonnie2001969**

_It is our pleasure to announce the Second Annual Profiler's Choice Fanfic Awards for the Criminal Minds community! _

_The nomination ballot is now available, and all rules are posted on Chit Chat on Author's Corner forum! Nomination ballots must be received by October 15, 2011 and must be sent to this PM at Profiler's Choice CM Awards. Fics for consideration must have appeared on the CM section of between September 1, 2010 and August 31, 2011 (see rules for full details.)_


	3. Take Down

**Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas.**

**This was originally a one-shot, but with a little encouragement it has grown. I am afraid I will be updating this one as it comes – sorry if the delay annoys you.**

**. . .**

Morgan was aware that someone was there, but who, he wasn't totally sure of yet. It wasn't unusual to share the FBI changing rooms with others; in fact it was more unusual to be there alone, even at weekends. As he exited the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist, Derek Morgan made his way towards his locker. On way he clocked the shadow of the person hovering nearby.

"You know Kid there are laws about hanging around in men's locker rooms? Loitering like that is going to get you a reputation."

Spencer Reid stepped forward into the light, head down and satchel bag over his shoulder. His hands were rammed deeply into his pants pockets. His feet shuffling the short distance he moved.

Derek had to smile, no matter the bravado, when push came to shove, under it all, was the Spencer Reid he knew. Focusing on dressing, he said nothing.

Spencer flopped onto the bench, his back to Derek, his body language screaming how uncomfortable he was.

"I am assuming you are here to speak to me and not for a random gym session, though when is your next update due?"

"Ha, Ha, you know I only just did it because use refused to assess me," Reid muttered.

"Because it would not be fair for me to do yours, I don't want to be accused of being soft on you, not that I would be, but I know how people are round here."

"Then why are you doing Emily's?" Spencer spun to face Derek, the anger evident in his face.

_So__that__was__what__this__was__about_ Morgan thought, pulling a t-shirt over his head before he sat down to face Spencer. Sighing deeply he looked at his hurt colleague.

"I'm doing it because I requested it," Derek dropped his head slightly at the confession.

"You requested it," Spencer repeated with disgust, "You turned me down, but requested her!"

"I ordered her," Derek said forcefully, raising his eyes to meet Spencer's. He knew how badly Spencer was hurting, they all were. Emily returning had torn the scabs off their freshly healing wounds. Nothing had prepared them for her return; nothing could, other than not being lied to in the first place.

"You ordered it?" Spencer questioned, a confused look wiping every ounce of anger from his features.

"I need to know I can work with her again," Derek shook his head, as if trying to shake the engrained images from his mind; "I lost her. I was the last person she spoke to before she left and the person found her when she was dying. I let her walk out of the bullpen. I asked her if she was good, she obviously wasn't, but I accepted her lie, just like I accepted the lie that she was dead. It was easier then fighting. I can't give up on her again. No matter what I think about what happened I need to fight for her this time. It's the only way I can deal with all of this."

"So you want her back?"

"Don't you? Would you really prefer Emily to be dead?" Derek shot at him, with more venom then he intended.

"I never said that," Spencer stumbled on his words, "Obviously I don't wish she was dead . . . I just . . . I can't . . . I don't know Morgan, that's the problem I don't know the answer."

Noting the further slump in Spencer's shoulders, Derek moved a little closer along the wooden bench.

"This is my way of working it out. I don't have the answer, but I'm finding a way through the problem, my way. It won't suit you and Emily, you need to find your own way," he paused hoping that what he was saying was sinking in, "Brute physical force, that's me. It's how I deal with all of this, not just Emily. I'm in the gym, out on a run or knocking the hell out of some house. That's me . . . my way."

Spencer was staring off into the distance, far beyond the steel grey lockers that blocked his view.

"You need to find your way, trust me when you are ready Em will take that journey with you."

"It's not just Emily," Derek took note that Spencer had finally used her name, "It's JJ and Hotch, they lied to us, all of us. Not a little white lie, but a huge life altering lie, one that nearly broke each of us."

By now Derek was a mere inch or two from Spencer. Pulling him into a brotherly hug, he hoped he could take some of the hurt from the young man.

"Don't look back; there is nothing there to see. Don't look ahead, as nothing can be predicted. Look around, this is your hear and now, make it count kid."

Spencer pulled back, looking at the older profiler.

"You are starting to sound like Rossi," he said, worry conveyed in his voice.

Derek smiled his infamous grin, "I may have borrowed that from him, but if you think about it he's right. We cannot change what happened. No matter how hard we try. It's over, draw a line under it. We have no idea what is to come, hopefully we can all come back together and move forward, not yet, but one day. But none of that will ever happen if we don't deal with the here and now."

"And you are doing that by punishing Emily in the Gym and Hogan's Alley?"

"Luckily, Pretty Boy," Derek stood, shoving his stuff in his gym bag, ready to go, " I don't think Emily views it that way."

Spencer screwed up his face, certain that any such form of physical exertion came firmly under the title punishment in his book.

"So what do I do?" the lost expression on Spencer's face, tugging at Derek's heart strings.

"I don't know," he shrugged, "What did you two do before Emily disappeared?"

"If I told you that I think Emily would kill me," Spencer said sincerely.

"Really?" Derek's eyebrows raised, "Just the sort of gossip Pen appreciates."

"What? That Emily is comfortable enough to show her inner geek to me."

"Is that what you guys call it? That's a new one on me," Derek smiled unable to resist teasing him.

Spencer looked perplexed; "What do you think I am talking about? We went to Science fairs, theatre and such like."

"Of course" Derek nodded, "What else could it be?"

Spencer knew Derek was trying to wind him up, but was unable to see how.

"There has to be something that you can invite her along to, trust me whatever you choose she'll say yes, so do your worse. Weren't you talking about a Dr Who conference the other week?"

"Yeah, but that's passed, or that would have been ideal."

"Yeah the perfect punishment, hell you could have taken JJ too. Two birds with one stone so to speak," he giggled, knowing what JJ and Emily would do to him if they ever knew he had suggested that.

"Derek, thank you."

"Anytime, now if you don't mind Emily owes me a drink, seeing she lost today's session," Derek picked up his bag and headed towards the door.

Spencer followed, the weight he was carrying having lifted slightly.


	4. Computer Chaos

**Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas.**

**I apologise that it has been so long, but I was away last week. However I am afraid I will be updating this one as it comes – sorry if the delay annoys you.**

. . .

Emily watched with more than a hint of envy as 'the boys' continued to bicker over the latest of their childish pranks. She had forgotten what those two were like when they got going. It was amazing how the humour had waned over the years, as the team had been hit by one thing after another.

Secretly she hoped that this was the beginning of a fresh start.

"Kid you should know you are never going to win," Derek taunted as he went passed, the bemused looking genius.

"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?"

"Whoa, what was that?" Morgan spun to face the younger agent.

"William Shakespeare, obviously"

"Obviously," Morgan smirked, "Quote your whole IQ away, I have won, there is no way you will top that."

"Morgan have an IQ of 187, do you really think you are ever going to genuinely win?"

"Not everything boils down to IQ."

"Really, I shall leave you to ponder that," Reid stated standing and leaving the bullpen to get a coffee.

Morgan laughed at the retreating form, turning to make his way towards his office.

"What you do to him this time?" Emily asked as he passed.

"You haven't heard?" he question showing his surprise.

"Well, um no, I haven't, but surely you haven't gone for public humiliation," she winced.

"Hey, give me some credit please; this is a master plan at work here."

"A master plan?" Emily queried.

"Yeah, don't sound so surprised, I'm not all brawn there is brain as well."

"Yeah and you keep in your pants from what I've heard," Emily snubbed, smirking as she returned to her work.

"Whoa, girl you are not getting away with a low shot like that. What gives? You get out the wrong side of bed or something?" Derek said as he perched himself on the side of her desk.

Shaking her head, Emily looked up at Derek, realising that there was no escape now.

"Call it a touch of the green eyed monster."

"You're jealous? Of what?" Derek's brow furrowed at the admission.

"You and Reid and . . ." Emily's voice tailed off, as she realised how petty it sounded.

"And what?"

"I miss the old days, the teasing, the fun, the laughter. On a good day Reid and I can manage a civilised conversation on a topic other then the latest case, but it's all so impersonal. Like he is talking at me rather than with me. I know I betrayed him, I get that, I betrayed you all, but I am starting to wonder if he will ever forgive me."

Emily physically slumped in her chair as the weight lifted at the end of her confession.

"He'll forgive, but he won't forget. That's Reid – take him or leave him, Prentiss you know that. He took a long time to get over Gideon, as you know, and that was only one person letting him down. This time three people have done that at the same time, and to make it worse he has to deal with each of you daily. Gideon wasn't here to face the anger, you all are."

Derek placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder and squeezed.

"I guess you just have to show him that you aren't going to give up on him."

_Easier__said__than__done,_ Emily thought.

. . .

Emily looked up at Spencer as he seemed to be getting increasingly frustrated by the computer in front of him. Biting the bullet, she stood and made her way over to his desk.

"Anything I can help with?" she asked casually, coffee mug in hand in case he rebuked her offer, she then had a reasonable escape plan.

Concentrating deeply on the screen in front of him, he spoke freely; "I would ask Garcia, she helped me before, but I'm afraid she may tell Morgan what I am doing this time!"

"Is this another prank? You do know what Hotch will do if he catches you guys up to this in work time."

"But I've finished my work," Spencer looked up innocently at Emily, "and I'm just researching. Well practicing really."

"Spill, what are you up to?" Emily crouched down beside Reid, willing accepting the current truce.

"Well, I found this techi website that has different IT based tricks that can be played. I have read it through and it all seems basic enough. In fact I have managed to complete a couple of the tasks on my own computer so that I know how long I need to have access to Derek's computer to do them, though I haven't been able to reverse the last one on here yet!"

Emily held the giggle as she looked at the screen that had a neon message running across it.

"Can I help?" she offered again.

"This will be fixed in a second," Spencer then stared directly at her, "But there is something you can do."

"Name it," Emily said keenly.

"I need access to Derek's computer. Can you distract him for me? Keep him out of his office until I give you the all clear," Spencer's eyes sparkled in a way she had not seen for a long time.

"Sure," she replied, standing and heading straight towards Derek's office.

As she reached the door, she knocked softly.

"Come in," came the deep voice from inside.

"Derek, have you got a moment?"

"Of course, come in."

Emily slipped into the office and the hovered nervously, realising she had gone off half-cocked.

"What is it Emily?" Derek looked genuinely concerned.

"Well . . . I was wondering if you . . . would like to go and get some . . . lunch," she spoke, thinking on her feet, "I have stupidly forgotten to bring anything with me, and since I've started this health kick I really can't face the canteen food. I hate eating out alone, would you join me in going out for lunch."

Derek nodded, he hadn't really got the time, as he had a pile of paperwork that Hotch was breathing down his neck for, but he knew how down Emily was and didn't want her eating alone.

"Sure, let's go."

. . .

Derek sat back behind his desk, actually feeling all the better for a proper lunch break. With a bit of luck he would crack on with the reports and be out at a reasonable time after all.

Waking his sleeping computer with a flick of the mouse, the neon greeting flashed across the screen:

And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?

Derek sighed_,__nice__try__kid_, as the message disappeared he clicked on the familiar icon to access his reports. Automatically the computer went into restart; Derek tutted his displeasure as he waited, the neon greeting taunting him as the computer reloaded. Again he clicked the icon, again the computer restarted, the same annoying message flashing before his desktop appeared. Clicking the icon for a third he hissed Spencer's name as he realised that yet again the genius had one up on him.

Stomping towards his door, ready to confront Reid, he paused. It suddenly dawned on him; Reid would have needed access to his computer. The only opportunity he had was while Derek was at lunch with Emily – had Reid colluded with Prentiss?

The thought of that made the annoyance worthwhile.

. . .

**I am putting a note on all of my stories to try and let people know that my updates my become a little erratic due to increased responsibilities at work from now until Christmas. I am sorry to do this. If I had known I would not have started posting stories until they were finished. Please bear with me.**


	5. Solaris

**Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas.**

**Thank you for the support and encouragement that has turned this story from a one-shot to a story. This final chapter is from an idea from lolyncut – hope I have done it justice.**

**. . .**

Morgan took a direct path through the bullpen to grab a coffee for lunch. He hadn't got time for a proper break so decided to get his head down and get on.

Many of the desks were empty as he made his way to the section's kitchen area. He couldn't help but notice a very troubled looking genius sat alone at his desk. Scanning around it was obvious that Emily and JJ had disappeared for something to eat. Carrying on past, he glanced at the contents of the desk for some clue as to what was causing the confused look on his younger friend.

Grabbing a spare mug out of the cupboard, Derek made quick work of rustling up two coffees, pouring plenty of sugar into one.

Returning the same way he had come, Morgan halted beside Spencer Reid. Placing the steaming mug down, he smiled.

"Look like you could do with this more than me, Pretty Boy."

Spencer looked up, his eyebrows knitting as he tried to process Derek's words.

"Thanks," he finally muttered, looking at the dark hot liquid.

"Anytime, want to tell me about it?"

"What?" Spencer's eyes shot up to meet the older agent, in a wide eyed innocence.

"Oh I don't know, how about whatever it is that is bothering you so much that it has stopped you from being even close to half way through your pile," Derek said as he wedged himself onto the edge of the desk, tapping the top of Spencer's in tray, "Usually shortly after lunch you are bothering us for extras to last the day out."

"Somehow I don't think bothering is the correct term," Spencer said with a slight smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Man, you know I hate to burden you with extra work," Derek shrugged, "But I couldn't call myself a friend if I didn't help you feel fulfilled in the workplace."

Even in his current frame of mind Spencer had to snigger at Derek's logic.

"Now that is more like it, so what's the issue?"

"Emily," Spencer said softly.

"Oh," Derek managed looking down at his mug.

"More specifically these," Spencer thrust a pair of tickets in Derek's direction.

Derek scanned the type on the cards, it meant nothing to him.

"Solaris?" he questions, eyebrow raised.

"It's a cinematic adaption of the Polish science fiction novel by Stanislaw Lem. It is about the ultimate inadequacy of communication between human and non-human species. In probing and examining the oceanic surface of the planet Solaris from a hovering research station the human scientists are, in turn, being studied by the planet itself, which probes for and examines the thoughts of the human beings who are analyzing it. Solaris has the ability to manifest their secret, guilty concerns in human form, for each scientist to personally confront. _Solaris_ is one of Lem's philosophic explorations of man's anthropomorphic limitations. What is most interesting is . . ."

Spencer's voice trailed off as Derek held his hand's up in submission.

"Kid save me the Lit lesson, it was never my favourite subject at school. Excuse me for missing the obvious link, but what does all of this have to do with Emily?"

"She gave me the tickets, for this weekend."

"And . . ." Derek prompted.

"And I don't know if I should go with her or not."

"Whoa, so Emily has given you both of the tickets."

Spencer nodded.

"So she'd not planning on joining you?

"I think she was, but I might have given her the impression I didn't want her to go with me."

Derek shook his head. Emily had obviously found an olive branch to offer Spencer and somehow he had managed to metaphorically throw it back in her face.

"Then you have to make it clear you would like her to come with you," Derek said matter of factly.

"I don't know if I do, the film is nearly five hours long, I haven't spent that long with Emily since she came back. I don't know if I'm ready."

"Let me get this straight, you have tickets to a movie, one that is likely to only attract the sort of person that actually concentrates on more than their popcorn aim, somehow I feel you won't need to worry about awkward silences in the conversation."

Spencer knew he had a point, and dropped his eyes back to the tickets resting on his desk.

"What have you got to lose?" Derek added as he rose to leave.

. . .

Coming out into the dark cold evening Emily was enthused by what she had seen.

"Wow, that certainly exercised the brain cells, my Russian has got seriously rusty."

Spencer rammed his hands into his slacks pockets as his walked in step with her.

"You know I'm really hungry, how about you?" Emily asked conscious of the lack of response from Spencer.

"I don't know, maybe I should get back. Thank you."

Emily stopped suddenly, Spencer took another couple of steps before he realised what she had done. Turning slowly to face her, Spencer struggled to meet her eyes.

"Spencer, I don't know what I can do to prove to you that I was wrong. I trusted you and I still do. I know what we did has hurt you and for that I am sorry, you don't know how sorry. Retrospect is an amazing thing, the only problem is you have to have made the mistakes to be able to realise where you went wrong."

"Are you saying you were wrong?"

Emily hung her head, no matter how many times she had a variation of this conversation, it got no easier.

"I was wrong a long time ago, but I did what I had to do to survive. When Doyle came after me I did what I thought was best to protect the team. He had made it clear that he would kill each of you to get to me. He was having you all watched ready. I had no choice; I had backed myself into a corner. The night they shot at Derek and me, I knew he would come after the team. He wouldn't know I hadn't told you."

Emily sighed deeply looking up at Spencer's intense hazel eyes.

"Let's go have something to eat and I promise you I will answer all of your questions openly and honestly. No more lies."

Spencer nodded.

Emily smiled, the tickets had originally been a small step, but now it had the potential of being a huge leap.

. . .

Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness, those are life-altering lessons.  
><strong>Jessica Lange<strong>

**. . .**

_**Author's Note: BIG ANNOUNCEMENT - THE FINAL VOTING BALLOT IS AVAILABLE FOR THE SECOND ANNUAL PROFILER'S CHOICE CM AWARDS on "CHIT CHAT ON AUTHOR'S CORNER" FORUM. Please take this opportunity to recognize some wonderful author's and their stunning pieces of fic. Voting ends 11/30/2011. Two Amazon gift cards will be given to two RANDOM voters that take the time to vote in ten or more categories. Congratulations to all of this year's nominees. Now, let's all read some CM fic!**_


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